My Psycho Villain Family

My entire family consisted of ruthless villains. And I was the only clueless fool in the house.

At the dinner table, Mom read aloud from my annual performance review: "This year, you faked crying twentyfour times and got caught twentythree times.

Your only strategy for dealing with haters was still running to the principal's office to cry." Chapter 1 The dining table fell dead silent.

My sister, Lorelei, sighed and looked at me with pity. "Blaire, you're a complete embarrassment to me." Her phone screen lit up, and I caught a glimpse of the contact name—[Ivy League Quarterback, 10.21]—who had just sent a message: [Baby, it hurts so much when you ignore me.

I'm literally crying.] [Notification: Black Card supplementary account successfully linked.] [Note: Voluntary gift.] Unbelievable.

Lorelei had the untouchable Ivy League quarterback whipped like a stray dog. And here I was, the older sister, who hadn't even brushed fingers with a guy yet.

My psychopath of a brother stared at me, his face a mask of ice. He cleared his throat stiffly. "It doesn't matter. You being alive is good enough.

Anyone messes with you, I'll end them." My brother never made empty threats. Last week, some guy purposely yanked my bikini straps loose and called me a freak.

I was just about to run to the principal's office to cry like a total loser.

Instead, my brother bought fifty pounds of Amazonian piranhas and dumped them all into the country club pool while that guy was throwing a party.

I heard the guy was still in the intensive care unit, wrapped up like a mummy from head to toe. "…" I stared at my plate and buried my head deep into my chest. "Dad, Mom, I'm just too stupid and naive.

I don't deserve to be a part of this family. I should just run away." I wiped away a nonexistent tear from the corner of my eye, letting my lower lip quiver just right.

Suddenly, our butler, Edgar, rushed into the dining room. "Sir, Ma'am, there is a young girl in a white dress at the front gates!" "She claims she is the real daughter of this family!" I rolled my eyes hard. "…?" Give me a break.

My twentyfifth attempt at faking a breakdown was ruined. Why was it so hard to play the pathetic victim? Someone always had to interrupt my performance. Wait!

I was supposed to be the daughter of this family… Oh my god! Was I actually the fake heiress all along? Savannah walked into the living room, wearing a plain white dress.

She twisted the hem of her skirt with rough hands, her voice barely above a whisper. "Mom, Dad, I finally found you.

The nurse at the private clinic back then said she accidentally swapped me with the baby of a woman living in a trailer park." She looked at me and suddenly started sobbing. "Blaire… I know you don't like me.

I can leave. It's just… I really wanted to be with my biological parents. Blaire, I won't try to take your place. Please, just let me stay with Mom and Dad for a little while.

I'm begging you…" Savannah's shoulders hitched, heavy tears smashing into the carpet. I shrank back into the sofa, my fingers digging hard into the edge of a throw pillow.

Even though I hadn't done anything, acid churned in my stomach, as if I had stolen everything from her. I sniffled, almost ready to start crying right along with her.

Until I looked around and noticed my entire family unfazed. My ruthless billionaire Dad stifled a yawn. My venomous, dropdead gorgeous Mom was admiring her manicure.

Lorelei tilted her head. "Hmm… the crying face is a little ugly. Needs more practice." My psychopath brother scoffed. "Hey.

Your nose is running." Savannah's breath hitched, and she quickly sniffled.

When she realized my brother was just messing with her, she bit down on her lower lip until it turned white.

I glared at my brother and couldn't help but mutter my complaint. "She's crying her eyes out. Why are you making fun of her?" My brother kept a straight face. "You idiot.

She's selling you out and you're helping her count the cash." I slammed my hand on the table. "You're the idiot! What cash?

I didn't take any cash!" Lorelei let out a long, dramatic sigh. "Blaire, this little girl is subtly implying that you, the fake heiress, are looking down on her, that you're jealous of her, and that you're going to kick her out." I scratched my head.

I took a hard look at Savannah's pale little face. She looked so wronged and innocent. Chapter 2 I stood my ground, raising my voice. "No way! She's so pathetic.

You guys are definitely overthinking this!" Hearing that, Savannah abruptly cut off her sobbing. She pointed a finger right at me. "Look at her!

A clueless idiot like her can't even tell when I'm being sarcastic right to her face. How could she possibly be your biological daughter!

Someone as manipulative as me fits right into this family, doesn't it?" Dad, who had been silent until now, nodded thoughtfully and instinctively reached for a cigar.

Catching my sharp glare, he put the torch lighter down. He clamped the unlit cigar between his teeth, just chewing on the end. "Alright. What do you want?" he asked Savannah.

Savannah's pupils dilated for a split second before she bit her lip and let out a small sob. "I want to join this family.

I want to feel the love I've been missing all these years… The moment I saw you all—Mom, Dad, my brother, my sister—I felt an instant connection.

This home must be so warm and loving.

You all must be such kind, wonderful people!" I scratched my head and pointed toward the front door. "Maybe you should go check with the neighbors across the street?" I seriously suspected she had the wrong address.

Because none of those words applied to my family.

But Savannah's mouth crumpled, her face scrunching up as if she was about to start wailing again. "Alright, stop crying." Lorelei stepped forward, gently taking Savannah's hands in hers. "Savannah, you should stay." Looking at my sister's sweet smile, a shiver ran down my spine.

I couldn't help but hold a moment of silence in my head for Savannah. I had no idea what kind of trap Lorelei was setting.

But my sister was the ultimate apex predator of manipulative girls. Whenever she smiled like that, someone was about to get destroyed.

Savannah latched onto Mom first. "Mom, you are so young and gorgeous. Before I came here, I heard people call you a venomous black widow, and I was actually terrified.

Now I know they're just jealous of you. They were just dragging your name through the mud! Mom, I love you so much.

I want to stay by your side forever." She was like a cheerleader on a sugar rush.

Within a few sentences, she had Mom smiling so hard the corners of her mouth almost reached her ears. Mom gently patted the top of Savannah's head. "Alright, my sweet girl.

Mommy has to go feed the pets now.

Why don't you entertain yourself for a bit?" "I want to come with you!" Savannah's face lit up with eagerness. "Mom, I love little animals too." Mom's eyes instantly lit up. "Oh, really?" Savannah shot a sideways glance at me and pouted. "Blaire, aren't you coming?

But I guess that makes sense.

Since you aren't her biological daughter, of course you wouldn't share Mom's and my deep love for little animals…" Before she could even finish her sentence, Mom had already grabbed her arm, practically dragging her away without looking back.

I sat back on the sofa, scooped up a massive bite of cake, and shoved it into my mouth. I swallowed my warning right along with the frosting. Savannah was absolutely right.

She and Mom were flesh and blood, tied together by genetics. So.

Savannah would probably also really love Mom's collection of venomous vipers and scorpions, right? … Five minutes later, a bloodcurdling scream ripped out of the basement.

Savannah was pale as a ghost, collapsed on the concrete floor, her heels scraping against the stone as she scrambled backward.

Towering in front of her were countless glass terrariums. Inside, snakes of every color and size imaginable flicked their forked tongues, their slitted pupils locked dead onto her.

Savannah's eyes bulged out of her skull. She raised a violently trembling finger, pointing it straight at me as I stood in the basement doorway. "You did this on purpose!

You wanted to see me make a fool of myself, so you didn't tell me Mom's pets were these disgusting freaks! Hah! Exactly what I'd expect from a fake heiress!

You act like a clueless idiot, but you're actually a calculating psycho!" Wow. I had no idea she thought I was a genius. Chapter 3 I waved my hand. "You're overthinking it.

You said yourself that you and Mom shared the same interests, so I just assumed you liked this kind of stuff too." People called Mom a venomous black widow. They meant it literally.

She loved collecting snakes and scorpions. When I was six and running a high fever, she wrapped a freezing cold black mamba around my neck. She claimed it would bring my fever down.

I was already terrified of my own shadow and burning up from the fever. The second I opened my eyes, I locked gazes with the beady green eyes of a massive snake.

My vision went black, and I almost saw the holy light of heaven on the spot. After that, Dad permanently banned Mom from using snakes to play with me.

My brother and sister weren't scared of them. But instead of raising them, they preferred turning the snakes and scorpions into stuffed and mounted displays.

To protect her precious babies from getting murdered, Mom banned both of them from stepping foot in the basement.

Now that Mom had finally found a "good kid" who actually loved her pets, she was thrilled. "Savannah, why are you sitting on the floor?" Mom walked back in, dangling two frozen white mice by their tails.

The mice swung back and forth. All the color drained from Savannah's face. She forced herself to stand up, sucking in a sharp breath.

Her pupils dilated as she unconsciously stepped backward. I couldn't watch this trainwreck anymore. "Mom, I think she's terrified of them," I pointed out. Mom froze.

Her face visibly dropped. "Oh… I see…" She forced a strained smile. "If you're scared, you can go upstairs with Blaire." Hearing that, Savannah's eyes darted around. "Mom, don't listen to her!

I'm not scared at all!" She clenched her fists and shot me a vicious glare. "Don't try to frame me! I am Mom's biological daughter.

I would never be scared of these little animals!" Mom's expression brightened instantly.

She nodded, pressing her hands against her chest. "Savannah, you really are my wonderful daughter!

Mom has a huge surprise for you." Savannah's eyes lit up. "What?" Mom smiled brightly and pointed straight at Savannah's shoulder. "Look!" Savannah turned her head eagerly.

A massive African Emperor Scorpion sat perched right on her collarbone, its curved stinger raised high. Savannah's face contorted.

It looked like a physical mask of agony had been slapped onto her features. Her lips quivered, but she didn't dare make a sound.

The scorpion's stinger gleamed with a cold blue tint, hovering less than half an inch from her pale neck. "Hhelp…" Savannah's voice trembled.

Before she could even finish her sentence, her eyes rolled back into her skull, and she passed out cold.

Mom shrieked. "My baby!" She scrambled over to Savannah, muttering "Please don't get hurt, baby" over and over as she carefully scooped the Emperor Scorpion off her shoulder and placed it back into its glass tank.

She completely forgot about the human body passed out on the concrete floor. I sighed, dragged Savannah off the floor, and dropped her onto the sofa.

I turned back to Mom. "Mom, forget about the scorpion for a second.

Look at Savannah." Mom finally snapped out of her trance and leaned over, hovering her hands anxiously. "She's still breathing. Not dead. Good." "…" Sigh.

That's a mother's love for you. In the end, my brother dragged Savannah back to her bedroom like a dead dog. The moment she woke up, Savannah latched right onto my brother.

Wearing a sheer lace nightgown, Savannah stood at my brother's bedroom door, biting her lower lip and rubbing the toe of her slipper against the carpet. "Brother, I can't fall asleep alone.

Can I come sit in your room for a while?" My brother's face was a stonecold mask. He stared down at Savannah, his tall frame blocking the hallway light.

Chapter 4 For a long moment, he just stood there. Then, he raised a handsome eyebrow. "You really want to come in?

Think it through." "Once you step into my room, you won't be coming out for the rest of the night." His voice was cold, slightly raspy, dropping like bait.

Savannah stared blankly, nodding mechanically. The smirk on my brother's lips deepened. "Alright. Come on in." That night, bloodcurdling screams echoed through the mansion.

Lorelei dragged her feet and yawned widely as she knocked on my bedroom door. "Blaire, do you have any extra earplugs?" I handed her a massive pack and silently looked up toward my brother's room.

I shifted my weight uneasily. "A whole night… Can Savannah actually handle that?" Lorelei flashed a sweet smile. "Don't worry, Blaire.

She's Mom and Dad's 'biological child.' She'll be perfectly fine." "Just make sure you don't go upstairs and interrupt them." For some reason, Lorelei emphasized the words "biological child" extremely hard.

I hesitated for a second, then nodded. "Okay. Makes sense." Right as I spoke, an even higherpitched scream ripped through the ceiling. Then, it abruptly cut off. Dead silence.

Was it over? Great. I stretched my arms and collapsed back onto my kingsized bed. I slept like a rock until the next afternoon.

I stumbled out of my bedroom to hunt for food and spotted my brother sitting on the sofa. He was engrossed in his beloved Human Anatomy Atlas, reading it with intense fascination.

I looked around the living room. "Brother, where's Savannah?" My brother didn't even look up as he turned a page. "Hasn't woken up yet." I nodded.

I minded my own business, pulling open the fridge to dig for snacks. By the third day, even a clueless idiot like me realized something was seriously wrong.

I shot up from the sofa, dropping my bag of potato chips onto the carpet. "Brother, Savannah still hasn't woken up? When exactly did she go to sleep?

How has she been asleep for two whole days?" My brother lowered his book and spoke with a flat voice. "She came to my room that night to watch a 5D horror movie.

Halfway through, she started screaming and just went to sleep. And she's been asleep ever since." "…Huh?" Screaming. And going to sleep at the same time.

My hand twitched, sending the rest of my chips scattering across the floor. I didn't even bother picking them up. I screamed at the top of my lungs. "Are you insane?!

She didn't fall asleep! She passed out!" Realization dawned on my brother's face. "Oh. That makes sense." He nodded.

And then he looked right back down at his anatomy book. "…" I stared at him, my jaw practically dropping to the floor.

I forced the words out. "Go upstairs and drag Savannah out of there! I'm calling the family doctor!" My brother frowned. "Is that really necessary?

Maybe she'll wake up if she just sleeps a few more days." "If she sleeps a few more days, she won't wake up!

She'll just start rotting and stinking!" My brother reluctantly gave in. "Fine." He walked upstairs. He dragged a ghostpale, unconscious Savannah out from under his bed.

Good news: she was still breathing. Two shots from the doctor later, Savannah's eyes snapped open.

Her eyes bugged out of her skull, locked onto my brother as she shrank against the wall. She looked at me.

Then she burst into tears, lunging forward to throw her arms around— Lorelei, who was standing right behind me. "Lorelei! You are the only good person in this entire house!

I'm sticking with you from now on!" Dead silence fell over the room. Mom, my brother, and I all stared at each other.

Finally, as the resident clueless idiot, I risked my life to speak up. "Maybe you should think that through?" I wanted to scream: You're terrified of snakes and scorpions, but you actually dare to get close to Lorelei?

But my warning backfired. The second I spoke, Savannah shrieked like a squeezed rubber chicken, throwing her arms up as a shield. "No!

I don't need to think about it!" Chapter 5 She clung tightly to Lorelei, shooting daggers at me. "Don't you dare try to drive a wedge between us! You're just a fake heiress!

You're trying to set me up!" The way she narrowed her eyes like a cornered animal made me sigh.

I quickly waved my hands. "You might be misunderstanding…" But Savannah wasn't listening. She shook her head like a rattle, muttering under her breath, "I don't care.

I'm sticking with Lorelei. She's going to protect me." Lorelei was being squeezed so tight she could barely breathe.

She tried to pull away, but Savannah just locked her grip tighter, whining tearfully, "Lorelei, you wouldn't abandon me, right?" Lorelei let out a long sigh, dropping her shoulders. "Alright, Savannah.

You can come to school with me tomorrow." Dad wrote a sevenfigure check to the school, ensuring Savannah was immediately transferred into Lorelei's exact class. However.

On her very first day sharing a desk with my sister, Savannah burst into tears again. The AP prep classes were brutally difficult. The other students had IQs rivaling Einstein.

And Lorelei was the most abnormal mutant of them all. She played on her phone during class.

Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, she'd hop on the bad boy's Harley Davidson for a joyride after school.

Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, she'd flirt with the frat president in the back row of Ivy League prep.

Every single day, her private locker was stuffed with designer bags and anonymous car keys.

Despite all that, she comfortably held the title of valedictorian, leaving the rest of the overachievers in the dust. The stark contrast ground Savannah into the dirt.

She tried to snag a better boyfriend just to oneup Lorelei.

But after two weeks of trying, she realized the devastating truth… Every toptier heir in Manhattan's Upper East Side who drove a sports car and wore a Rolex was already a backup in Lorelei's contacts.

She tried using her manipulative little tricks to poach a guy from Lorelei's roster. Unfortunately. She failed every single time.

The Wall Street hedge fund heir threw a yacht party for his birthday. Savannah wore a white dress and went up on stage to dance ballet.

Her graceful movements made the heir's eyes widen. He grabbed Lorelei's hand tightly. "Lorelei, look!

A living music box!" So, Savannah was ordered to keep dancing for the entire night. The bad boy had a basketball game.

When Savannah found out Lorelei was too busy to go, she secretly took the VIP ticket he had given my sister and showed up. She cheered him on and acted like a cheerleader.

At halftime, she eagerly jogged over to hand him a sports drink. Who would have guessed the bad boy was deathly allergic to the strawberries in the drink?

Right in the middle of the stadium, in front of thousands of people, he collapsed weakly to the floor. His threeyear championship streak ended right there.

Word was, the bad boy was lying in his hospital bed with lips swollen like sausages, crying like a ridiculous threeyearold baby.

He declared that from now on, Savannah and dogs were banned from the basketball court. After suffering blow after blow.

Savannah slumped onto the sofa like a deflated balloon, devoid of life. She stared blankly at the ceiling, constantly muttering, "Why does this keep happening?

I'm so much prettier than her. Why can't I beat her?" I took another bite of my cake and shot her a look of pity. I pushed my plate toward her. "Eat some sugar.

It'll make you feel better." Savannah swatted my hand away, sending the plate flying. "Smack!" White frosting splattered across the floor.

A stinging red welt appeared on the back of my hand. "How can you be so damn oblivious!" She glared at me, her eyes bloodshot. "You stole twenty years of my life!

You lived like a rich princess while I suffered! Why?!

I'm going to kick you, you fake, out of this house!" Without warning, she started slapping herself in the face and pinching her own arms like a lunatic.

I sucked in a sharp breath, my fork slipping from my fingers and clattering against the floor. I just stared at her in shock as she continued to selfharm.

Apparently, she didn't think that was enough. Chapter 6 Savannah grabbed the cake knife off the table and slashed it across her wrist.

Blood instantly welled up and dripped onto the floor. Savannah locked her eyes dead onto me.

A smug smile crept across her face. "Blaire, I might not be able to handle the rest of this family, but do you really think I can't handle you?

I'm going to make sure you get kicked out of this house forever! I'm going to leave you with absolutely nothing!" She snatched my brother's Human Anatomy Atlas off the bookshelf.

She flicked open a lighter. Whoosh. Flames erupted. My eyes widened, my brain shortcircuiting as the flames licked the pages. That was my brother's absolute favorite book!

I lunged forward, desperately trying to snatch the atlas back. Savannah shoved me hard in the chest, sending me crashing to the floor.

Hearing the commotion, Edgar rushed into the living room and quickly put out the fire. Mom and Dad rushed back from their corporate offices.

Taking in the bloody cut on Savannah's wrist and the utter chaos of the living room, their eyes widened.

Dad rubbed his chin and looked at me. "Blaire, did you do this?" His voice didn't hold a single ounce of anger. Instead, the corners of his mouth twitched up, his eyes gleaming